So what..

Body going through the motions .. brain offline.

Bloodbath

What a lovely day it’s been.  I work for a bank and watched another bank down the road (my spouse happens to work for Wachovia Bank) explode into pieces.  The Dow lost 777 points (in case you somehow missed it) and the carnage was all over Wall Street.  I was also able to sit and watch both my kid’s college funds and my own retirement savings vaporize before my eyes.  It’s anybody’s guess how this mess is going to be resolved but a lot of good people are going to lose their jobs and subsequently, their homes and their savings.  The wonderful “trickle down” effect that the Republicans are so fond of has become a bloody landslide which has buried a lot of innocent bystanders.  

Free market system?  Or free fall?  Nothing in life is free and it just got a whole lot more expensive.

Crazy Friday

I do NOT like starting my day this way.  My daughter drops an entire pan of lemon squares on my kitchen floor.  Tears and hysteria ensue until I help her clean it up and try to salvage a plate of them to take to school for extra credit.  She runs off to catch her bus and leaves me with a major mess to clean up.  Oh and I was up till 11pm last night helping her MAKE the damn things…   Other daughter forgot her cell phone and I have to take it to school — don’t want her out driving with no cell phone in the rain.  (sigh)  Son is still somewhat sick and very congested.  Sent him off to school after pouring Musinex down his unwilling and gagging throat.  Mother expects me to take her out to dinner tonight and I am already exhausted and it’s only 7:15am.  

I need a clone.

Ok, thanks for letting me vent.  Thank God for the relative peace of my office at work.

John

I’m sitting here sipping my coffee and thinking about John.  A light went out in our lives.  It was 22 years ago today that we lost him.  The worst day of my life.  He was 28 years old.  Bright, animated and exuberant … he had a charismatic personality that attracted scores of friends.  This day was the beginning of the end for my father who never really recovered.  His sadness brought on the decline of his health which pulled him down and he became a shell of the man he’d been.  My mother retreated into her own Neverland and became unable to talk about him with anyone else but me and even then it was with torrents of weeping and regret.  

I have no regret.  Well, of course I regret that we lost him.  We had a good rapport, my brother and I.  In spite of being complete opposites in every way.  But we had a connection.  I always took it for granted that, as we mindless humans do, we would always have each other to see us through … well, life.  Our adulthood and our parents old age. My only regret after all this is that I never had the chance to kick his BUTT for leaving and causing all this misery.

Maybe someday I will. <G>

I will never forget you John Joseph McLaughlin.  Born April 12, 1958. Died September 20th, 1986.  Rest in peace brother.

Cabarrus County Fair

Here are Sam and his buddy Olivia at the Cabarrus County Fair a couple of weeks ago …

New driver

New driver in the family…

Pneumonia

Walking Pneumonia … who’d have thought?  Poor Sam … out of school today.  Again tomorrow.  He doesn’t seem all that sick but OH that cough … very goopy.  We enjoyed our quiet day today.  I got him some Ben & Jerry’s to lift his spirits.  He is a good little patient.

Home

Home today with a sick little boy.  I can actually use this day to get some stuff done around the house.  He has a fever, sore throat and stomach ache.  That about covers it.  Hopefully just a virus and not strep.  I hate when my kids get strep — somehow I always manage to get it too.  :-(

Dropped another one

Just got home from the gym. Tired but happy. I worked out and weighed myself (trying not to do this too often) and I’ve dropped another pound. I started out a couple of weeks ago at 139 and I’m down to 136.
It surprises me how much small changes make a difference. I’ve given up alcohol during the week (I might have a single glass of wine on Saturday night – no more) and I’m a lot more active. No cheese or mayo and little things like that. No chips and cutting back on carbs and increasing my protein. So hey it seems to be working. My goal is to get to 130.
I can do it !!

Mom

My mom is making me crazy.  First off, you need to understand she is 90.  Yes, that is BLOODY old.  But she does not look, or act, old.  She is Irish.  Both her parents came from Ireland.  Her father moved to this country when he was 19 and her mother when she was about 4.  Irish folks are strong willed and STUBBORN.  And she refuses, no matter what, to accept help from ANYONE … except me.  So annoying.  Here I am … an exhausted mother of 3 who has a fulltime job … and I have to cater to a strong-willed, annoying mother.  I know … poor, sweet little old lady.  CRAP.  She would make Gengis Khan look like a wimp.  
So we had this argument…  It all began when I calmly suggested that Audrey, my 17 year-old daughter who is a high school senior and DRIVES can help her out with going to the supermarket and getting her groceries.  WELL … you would have thought I had suggested that she drink cyanide.  She right away started crying (yes she has that amazing ability to turn on the tears when necessary — I have never managed to develop this most useful female talent) and said she “never should have sold her home in Florida and moved up here…”  Shit.  I am so tired of that line.  Really mom, get a new one.  Every time she isn’t happy with me or how I do things or how her situation is working out she says the same thing…   “I should never have let you talk me into moving to Charlotte..”  Well bloody HELL … I wish I hadn’t either.  Sorry, I’m going to be struck by lightening, but hey, if she’s so damn miserable then she should have stayed in Florida and been thrashed by every stupid hurricane that came through …

Ok I digress.

Mom does not want help.  From anyone.  That is … anyone except ME.  So what do I do?  There are simply not enough hours in the day/week to keep her happy.   As it is now, I take her to the supermarket on Monday nights and on Friday night I take her out to dinner.  Sometimes on weekends I take her to the mall or wherever she needs to go. I make myself available as often as possible.  I have no LIFE other than work and kids and my dear mother.

I have created a monster.

I need a clone.  I need some help.  I need advice.

 

Mary